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  • Writer's picturethudds

Gave it 20...

Updated: Jul 5, 2023 career that is..I've ploughed 20 years into building my corporate I am pregnant at 44...

A few friends and family members have asked if I am writing a blog about it all, so I thought FUCK IT! Why not?

About Me.

I was born in Derbyshire to a working class family. The men on both sides had worked for the coal board in some capacity, mostly in the mines. I grew up up with no business role models, no frame of reference for corporate careers beyond film and T.V. In fact I grew up in a wonderfully innocent era, before social media, before SATs. When kids still played out on their bikes until it went dark, and 'prepping for the future' was nothing more sinister or taxing than going to school.

I had never been to London until my Dad took me there just after my 19th birthday. The moment I stepped off the train in grand old St. Pancras station, something changed. I got a whole new perspective. I wanted more, I still want more.

A picture of the author giving a presentation at Vodafone Headquarters
Presenting at Vodafone Global HQ

Present Day.

I am a multi-award winning, multi-£m enterprise seller with experience in pharmaceuticals and technology. I have worked for four FTSE 100 companies and one in the FTSE 250, alongside which I have successfully run my own businesses since 2005. I am an accomplished speaker and coach, and I am also a pretty good dance and fitness instructor.

BUT NONE OF THIS FUCKING MATTERS NOW I'M PREGNANT, because clearly that MUST be the crowning achievement of my life...right?

My entire world's sense of balance and achievement seems to have radically slipped overnight. Not for me, not internally. But the way other people value me has chaaangeeeed. I don't like it. I feels like they didn't view me as a real or complete person before this.

Can anyone have it all..?

A picture of the character J.C. Wiatt, played by Diane Keating in the film Baby Boom
J.C. Wiatt played by Diane Keaton in the film Baby Boom

I have always been a huge fan of Diane Keaton. I think my obsession with corporate careers began when I first saw 'Baby Boom' in the late 80's (maybe it was early 90's when I saw it). The premise of the film is that Diane's character, J.C. Wiatt is a high-powered business woman, married to her job, doesn't want kids. But then she (SPOILER ALERT) inherits a baby from a cousin who died. Her corporate world begins to crumble, but it all comes good in the end when she moves to the country and starts her own $m business. I just love this quote in response to her former boss saying that no one can have it all...

" you remember that night when you told me about the things I was gonna have to give up and the sacrifices I would to make? I don’t wanna make those sacrifices, and the bottom line is, nobody should have to.”

So, as I crack on with this "beautiful journey" of pregnancy over 40, (and I am almost 23 weeks now), I am determined to do this my way. To ignore the judgey-Jills, the naysayers and the downright rude. I don't know if I'll be proved wrong. I dont know if in 6 months time or 12 months time I'll be eating my words. But I want to share the experience, the challenges and the successes. Care to join me? Subscribe now for new posts.

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